I'm currently two days out from my next competition. It's been my experience that the final week leading up to competition is the most gruelling to conquer. Physical fatigue sets in first, followed by the aches and pains, insomnia, suppressed appetite, fluctuating emotions/moods and finally mental exhaustion. It's during this week when you truly have to stay focused on your why factor... which is the reason you decided to do anything in life. For each of us our reasons are different but it's our why factor that keeps us focused and gives us the ability to conjure up the strength to endure and succeed.
I'm often asked why I decided to start training and competing; for me the answer is simple.
When I was a little girl my father was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Not long after his diagnosis he was completely wheelchair bound. My mother, two older sisters and I spent the next 9 years renovating our home in the country to make it wheelchair assessable. My parents built their home with their own two hands after getting married at the young ages of 19 and 20. We lived an hour from the nearest city. Despite the doctors encouraging my parents to move to the city for additional help my father was very adamant that he stay in his log home. He claimed that he built that home with his own two hands and will die there in peace.
Life growing up was difficult and a nightmare at times; on a daily basis we were faced with constant trials... the types of situations that tested your mental, emotional and physical strength. I discovered at an early age that under pressure we can fight and survive anything if we choose too.
Growing up in the country my family had to provide for ourselves. I'm often judged by my appearance so people would never guess that I'm a tom boy at heart. My list of skills can be quite surprising... things people wouldn't know about me include:
- I have my hunting and fishing licence
- I own firearms and multiple knives; I have impeccable aim
- I gut and skin deer
- I can do anything when it comes to building homes
- I change oil and filters in vehicles
- I split and pile endless amounts of firewood
- I worked road construction
- I have my trucking licence
- I know how to operate dozers, scrapers, loaders and graders
- I used to operate the worlds largest haul trucks in the Canadian Oil Fields
Growing up solely on my mothers income with a disabled father was overwhelming. Naturally because of this my sisters and I became overachievers in life. We always set the most unachievable goals.. pushed ourselves to succeed and we did it all for one reason only. Happy times were few and far between in my home so my sisters and I would put all of our anger and frustration into our accomplishments just to see our parents smile for 10 seconds and to give them a sense of pride. Those moments didn't last long until they were robbed from us by the MS. It was a vicious cycle that not all of us would survive.
Each year my fathers condition progressively worsened. The most remarkable thing about my father is no matter how bad things got he still never complained... he always had a smile on his face and managed to poke fun of me. I was daddies little girl, his hands and feet... everything I did was for him and my mother. The least I could do was be a good child and grow as an individual in response to their superior upbringing. I watched him struggle every day through the simplest tasks that we healthy people constantly take for granted. I vowed to myself that I would cherish my health and preserve it as I have the choice and my father didn't. I'm 27 years old and I can honestly say I don't drink and I've never tried smoking or a single recreational drug. I used to bring troubled friends into my home to meet my father and see what his life was like... a lot of my friends gave up the smoking, drinking and drugs because of the fear of losing their health. It's my drive to find a positive in all negatives.
My father and I were inseparable; there was even a time when I did home schooling to be by his side. As a little girl I wanted to be so much like my father that I would dress like him even if that meant I would be wearing only a pair of shorts! My father was super athletic and passed his love for sports on to me. I played every sport possible and shared the passion of track and field with my father. I would always tell him the morning of track meets that I would bring him first place ribbons home and I always did. It was my father and his smile and laughter that gave me the drive to push through the pain and succeed.
On February 24th, 2004 my father was taken from me by MS's final act of robbery.
My father is the most incredible, strong, intelligent, happy man that I have ever known. I am his legacy and dedicate my life, my challenges, my goals and my success to him. If I can be one quarter as great as him when I die then I can pass happily.
My parents are my heroes and inspirations; everything I strive to be. They have shown me the tools to life's success and although the journey is never easy the perseverance is always greatly rewarded.
I miss my father greatly... and even though 19 years wasn't long enough with him I don't feel sorry for myself. My father is more of a man than any other and the 19 years with him in my life was a complete blessing! I would not be the woman I am today had I not experienced what I have in my past. I wouldn't change it for the world!
My why factor in life is first and for most my father. I owe my life and success to him and my mother and I vow to spend the rest of my life justifying his misfortune. I promised him I'd live life to the fullest and experience everything life has to offer. Material things can be damaged, broken and stolen... but life experience is the very essence of our souls... it defines who we are, what we survived and it's the only thing that departs with us when we leave this world.
Every day I want to quit, I want to give up, I want to lift lighter, do less reps, less cardio, I want to eat bad food.... but then I think of my father, what a fighter he was, what I owe him, the choices he would make... how if my father had been given the choice to run a day straight or remain in his wheelchair what he would choose. Everything I do is for him... his spirit is what gives me the drive to go on, fight, survive and succeed.
I have the choice... I will fight, I will push myself beyond belief, I will survive and conquer all in the sake of his name.
Physically my body gave up weeks ago and it's only been this week that my body started wavering mentally. It was my why factor that kept me focused and gave me the strength to survive.
This weekend my fathers spirit will be with me on stage; I will stand tall and smile knowing that he's looking down on me and he's proud of his little warrior.....
Daddy, thank you for being my pillar of strength, my hero, my inspiration and now my very own guardian angel...
I miss you and I love you...
Last year I started my first ever competition season off with two competitions on back to back Saturdays. This wasn't entirely smart but in the world of competing we don't have the luxury of choosing the dates of our competitions.
Any competitor will tell you that the final week before competition can be hell due to carb cutting and water and diet restrictions. Pair this with lack of sleep from traveling, a change of environment and competition nerves and you've got a recipe for physical break down.
A competitors competition day can start as early as four am with hair and make up appointments and will last well into the evening past midnight. Training and eating clean is part of a balanced healthy lifestyle but the actual competition weekend isn't healthy by any means. We do what it takes to look our best on stage even if that means drinking next to no water for several days and eating very little.
My first competition was a complete physical shock to the system which left me severely fatigued and run down. I didn't even have time to recover from the first competition and I was already preparing for the second.
I'm a healthy person with a strong immune system who rarely ever gets colds or flus. Despite my great health, the day after my second competition I came down with the worst flu I've ever had in my entire life. My body ached, I had a fever, chills, sore throat and extreme fatigue. This flu was relentless and persisted for three weeks; it was so severe no meds helped and I literally lived on the couch. During this time I was unable to train and ate next to nothing... the end result was me losing 13 pounds of muscle which was detrimental to my competition physique.
I finally started to recover and gain strength one week out from the Canadian Nationals. I remember looking in the mirror and feeling completely devastated and mortified. All of those weeks of hard training completely lost; I now looked anorexic! The defining moment was fast approaching. I knew one week out from competition that the moment I had trained for had been completely robbed from me by a distractible flu that I didn't even see coming. Competitors think simply; eat, train, sleep, eat, train, sleep... we train our bodies to be strong and we feel indestructible; no where in our minds do we ever factor in possibly getting sick. I was blindsided and naive and totally deserved this eyeopener for taking my health for granted and pushing my body beyond its limits. Looking back now I realize all of the tell tale signs warning me of the possible end result of exhaustion and illness which I chose to ignore. Balance; the key is always balance, which is what I now strive for constantly.
One week out from Nationals I still had limited energy and hardly any appetite. In a desperate attempt to pack the muscle back on and selvage the remainder of the season I was advised to increase my protein intake and recommended to find a suitable protein powder to aid in this matter. I started my search already feeling hopeless due to all of my food allergies. I'm unable to have egg, whey, casein and soy protein. In the past I have tried rice and pea protein and found them to be quite nasty!
I went to a local supplement store and was alarmed to hear about a new type of protein powder on the market; beef protein powder! I bought a container of Carnivor chocolate flavoured beef protein powder by MuscleMeds. Every time I experiment with a new protein powder I put it through the ultimate test and mix a serving with water. Boy did I have my mind blown when I tried this with my new beef protein powder! It was so delicious that I instantly became a Carnivor junky :) For four weeks I had two to three servings a day combined with my regular diet and to my astonishment I recovered my physique. I honestly don't know what I would have done had I not discovered this product, it's truly been life changing for me :D I'm such a huge believer in this product that I highly recommend it to everyone and have converted several friends over to Carnivor.
Food allergies and diet restricting diseases/conditions are becoming more common every year. A lot of supplement companies don't realize the huge market (including people such as myself) that need supplementation that just isn't there. MuscleMeds was truly on to something when they created this product; its a perfect source of high protein with zero fat, zero cholesterol and zero sugar and it tastes amazing even when mixed with only water!
Physically I wouldn't be the woman I am today without Carnivor.....
I'm forever grateful for this product =)
I'm currently 9 weeks out from my next competition which means that strict dreadful diet season has officially began. I often have frustrated people ask me about my workout regimen because they claim they're busting their butts and not getting the results they desire. That's usually my cue to ask about their eating habits. What people don't realize is diet is a large portion of the overall picture. We're all beginners at one time or another and I remember and still occasionally feel overwhelmed by the slew of health and wellness information floating around. It's challenging to find your way and weed through the plethora of information accessible to us; what with fad diets, new exercise trends and the latest mystery supplements.
Back in the day I used to be the "skinny-fat girl"; I was slender with very little muscle mass and over 20% body fat. I had the idea that I would exercise and not eat! What I'm realizing more and more is that a lot of young girls tend to share this logic. I used to go the entire day without eating and then eat one large meal before bed. I don't know where in my brain this made sense and why I never thought about how unhealthy this plan was.
Up until one year ago my eating habits were still very poor; it's not that I ate junk food, I just never had an appetite or was always to busy to eat. For me the hardest part of competing is never the training and always the diet. I have no problem with eating clean healthy foods; it's the amount of food and how often that I have to eat that's the issue. I've had an entire year to work out the kinks and come up with a fail proof plan that works for me and should simplify anyones life.
Each day I eat six meals, I space them out approximately every two hours. I eat the same six meals seven days a week in the exact same order. I train six days a week and Sunday is always my off day which works out perfectly for my meal planning. I buy all of my groceries and cook, portion and freeze them for the upcoming week on Sunday. I've got a good system going and now know (through trial and error) which order to cook and portion my food in the shortest amount of time possible. It takes me two hours to cook and portion 42 meals :)
My diet consists of six different types of meat, very little fruit, brown rice, baked potatoes and lots of salad. I also drink at least a gallon of water each day; which is a major achievement for me because I used to go an entire day and drink only two cups of water! Again with my young inexperienced not so smart logic!
Your body is your temple and you only get one... It's our responsibility to preserve our health and treat our body great by feeding it the cleanest foods, drinking lots of water, getting proper rest and exercising regularly. We're not garbage disposals so why eat junk?!?! I've learned if you're good to your body in return it'll be good to you =)
I'm relatively new to the competitive fitness industry. For years it was a dream of mine to compete solely inspired by bodybuilding friends and fitness model Jamie Eason. I remember looking through fitness magazines thinking "If only I had the drive and knowledge to achieve those results". After several years of longing I decided to make my dreams a reality and began training only one short year ago on April 18th. I began and continue to train at Goodlife Fitness where one of the personal trainers suggested a local competition trainer. I knew at the time I didn't have the required knowledge to train and diet properly for a competition and needed to seek outside help. I picked a local trainer and started a new diet and fitness regimen and what a shock to the system that was! I will admit that the first 4 weeks were the hardest but I was determined and stuck with the plan. My trainer explained that he wanted me to compete at the upcoming ABBA Alberta Provincials in 9 weeks; I was freaking out due to the short time span. He assured me that I was a direct reflection of his training and he wouldn't allow me to step on stage if he didn't think I were ready. I've learned that we're our own worst critic and if my trainer deemed me ready and I felt otherwise I would pull the plug myself and not compete.
As the weeks rolled by I was surprised by my results and how much easier the diet and workout regimen was getting. Competition day came and there I was in the middle... I was nervous and excited; I was going to compete and I hadn't ever seen a competition! I took a deep breath and went for it :) I remember the day seeming endless but the overall outcome was a complete humbling shock! After 9 weeks of training I never expected to make top ten let alone place. It was such an invigorating feeling and I knew instantly that this sport was for me. I went on to compete in 4 more competitions totalling 5 competitions in four months; It was hectic and brutal but I loved it!
In the last year there were ups and downs and major personal health issues to overcome... I fought hard and survived. A year ago when I began training a veteran bodybuilder told me "after the next twelve weeks of training and competing you will no longer be who you are today, not just physically but mentally and emotionally". He was very accurate... I've gained more mental and emotional strength while training then physical. I am disciplined and can overcome any obstacle. I honestly believe that had I not started this journey a year ago I wouldn't have been able to conquer what I have in the last nine months.
I often get asked questions about my fitness journey and was encouraged to start a blog for my friends, fans and support system. It only took six months but here I am posting my first blog :) I will be updating my blog often so feel free to follow...
This is me...
This is my journey
When I was a little girl my father was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Not long after his diagnosis he was completely wheelchair bound. My mother, two older sisters and I spent the next 9 years renovating our home in the country to make it wheelchair assessable. My parents built their home with their own two hands after getting married at the young ages of 19 and 20. We lived an hour from the nearest city. Despite the doctors encouraging my parents to move to the city for additional help my father was very adamant that he stay in his log home. He claimed that he built that home with his own two hands and will die there in peace. 
Growing up solely on my mothers income with a disabled father was overwhelming. Naturally because of this my sisters and I became overachievers in life. We always set the most unachievable goals.. pushed ourselves to succeed and we did it all for one reason only. Happy times were few and far between in my home so my sisters and I would put all of our anger and frustration into our accomplishments just to see our parents smile for 10 seconds and to give them a sense of pride. Those moments didn't last long until they were robbed from us by the MS. It was a vicious cycle that not all of us would survive.
My father is the most incredible, strong, intelligent, happy man that I have ever known. I am his legacy and dedicate my life, my challenges, my goals and my success to him. If I can be one quarter as great as him when I die then I can pass happily. 
